Part 2: The Departed

Grabbing my 40-pound mountain bike, knowing that I would have to rely on it as my only method of transportation, was earth shattering. The thought of 36 miles on that steel beast made me feel just of my punishment. Letting go and moving on are always the hardest part. Albeit, losing my license and ability to travel freely felt horrible; I remember telling myself to be optimistic and embrace the things that were happening to me, not to cherish them but to harness them as a means to become something better.



Change is something that is not easy; its difficult, ugly and constant work. This situation was definitely not one of grace, with a mid 90’s steel mountain bike that had not been ridden in years and the 230 pound out-of-shape partier riding it 140 miles a week to get to work and school. The idea seemed insane to everyone around me; no one believed that I would actually get on the bike and ride, everyone was holding their breath wanting me to ask them for transportation.

Starting out the first week was miserable and I remember thinking this was going to be the worst six months ever. My optimism would remind me that at least it wasn’t winter. After the second week, I began to find peace and discover myself in ways that I never knew were possible. I knew now at this point that I would never ask for transportation and thus my love for cycling began. Instead of dreading the morning ride to school, I began to embrace it. After the first month, one of my co-workers offered me a newer road bike and shoes that he no longer wanted, it was an offer I couldn’t refuse.

Slowly those around me saw the change inside of me, as well as a physical change. I was becoming leaner, happier and more focused than I had been in years. Personally, I was feeling amazing and more confident. My weight had dipped under 200 pounds for the first time in 3 years. Although, this change was coming slowly and I wanted to embrace it as much as possible. This meant going beyond working out, this meant DIET!




In order to keep change moving, I had to dig deep and give up things I loved. This meant no more fast food, no more sweets and pretty much no more anything that tasted delicious. I remember having to convince myself of the values of fruit and vegetables while hating how they tasted. This was not going to be easy, but for the first time in my life I felt like I had control of a situation. I had the power and reserve to make it through even the hardest tasks.

As my love for cycling grew, riding for necessity turned into riding for recreation. Riding provided the structure from definite chaos. The recreational rides increased, so did my desire to try my hand at racing, and Colorado State University provided an excellent resource in its collegiate division. I was lucky to have some friends that were established officers with the team which made joining hassle free. It was something new and exciting for me; something that I was going head first into with no idea of the commitment required. But with that aside, I departed with my prior self and went looking into uncharted grounds…

Team Press Release 2009

Hey Everyone, Our team press release hit this morning featured on the front page of Velonews, http://www.velonews.com/article/86340/ten-speed-driveellsworth-factory-cycling-team

Part One: The Meeting

As featured on Armada Racing,

I gave myself three choices:

1. Join the Marines.
   
2. Change my life.
   
3. Stop playing around and end it.

It finally had come to this point. After the past two weeks hoping I wouldn’t wake up, I’d finally hit the bottom. I knew something had to change because I could not go on being this miserable.

My day included waking up hung over, going to class, going to work and then drinking; but not to enjoy, but rather, to fill the void. I knew this wasn’t meant for me, so I had a “meeting” with myself, giving the three most rational answers I could come up with. I sat alone in my room pondering each one, thinking of the pros and cons.

At the time, door number one was looking to be the best option after a few recruiting visits and to validate, I would drop subtle hints at family dinners to gauge reactions…
I knew that the Marines and certain deployment in Afghanistan was not my path. Wanting to fight for the flag and fighting for myself were two different things that did not line up.

After thinking about ending everything violently, I knew that the love that I had for my family would never let me do this either. Having them discover such a scene was something I couldn’t stomach regardless of how depressed I was.

This left one option: CHANGE… Just by luck this would not be the easiest choice either, but after this meeting I was determined to be happy and find a path in life. I knew this was going to be a change for the long haul and that changes that work need to be slow and lasting.

But wait! What was I changing?

Going back in time, I was about 16 when this all started, playing competitive youth hockey, the sport also provided a lifestyle of drinking and partying. After high school I lost interest in the sport, but still wanted and needed that party lifestyle. Before I knew it, the lifestyle had swallowed me whole, forging two years of my life over to the bottle. Work did not help since I worked in a hockey shop, which perpetuated this lifestyle. It was perfectly normal for us to come to work, still a wreck from the night before. This was my life, and it provided a nice hole of depression for me to crawl into, and as it happened, I didn't realize it until I was already at the bottom.

So back to change, which was surprisingly easier than I thought. It became easy to not drink every night, and I had made steady improvements over a month-long period. Unfortunately this was not good enough; one slip up is very easy and comes suddenly.

I remember being upset about getting sent to the Boulder store location, but had no choice but to go. Basically this meant that I would be getting home even later for my Friday night out. After a long afternoon at the Boulder location, with no staff besides myself, I was ready for a drink. One thing leads to another and next thing I know I am drinking and driving. Despite the risk, I am almost home, planning my night out and as I stop for a red light, BOOM, I get plowed into. I remember seeing the headlights thinking “oh no” but there was no avoiding. My car is totaled; the damage wasn’t even explainable until I pulled myself out of the car. I realize the person behind me is seriously injured, both cars are totaled and I am seriously screwed.

As the police approach, part of me feels like this whole situation can still be ok while the other side knows we are imminently doomed. It doesn’t take much for the officer to realize that I am under influence and next thing I know I am doing roadside tests like a bad episode of Cops, knowing that any hope of not getting arrested is over. After my humiliation, I am handcuffed and thrown in the back of the police cruiser pondering how things could be any worse and how I am going to explain this to everyone.

To my surprise, because I was rather orderly and compliant with the officer, I was able to avoid spending anytime in jail and got released a few hours later to one of my friends. Finally upon getting home, I faced the inevitable, waking my parents up at 1:00 am to break the news. I was shocked by their reaction; they were comforting and happy that I wasn’t the one who caused the accident. They calmed me down and had me get some rest.

The next day I was proactive about the situation, knowing it was a delicate one; I contacted my employer and Eric Sunness, a good friend who was also a great lawyer. I continued to be surprised by the reactions of those around me, and this brought me hope knowing that these people were supporting me through this. After some legal meetings, it was apparent that I was going to lose my license, but would be able to expunge the incident from my record. I knew at this moment that this incident needed to be transformed. This was a horrible thing, but I was determined to make it the best thing that had ever happened to me. This had been the path that I needed to change, although it wasn’t the path I wanted to take…

Sacrifices Video for GSSI

Hello Friends,

So this past weekend has been another fun one, its almost 1am and I am just finishing up my demo video for the GSSI Show. So on top of riding, I became an expert at filming and video editing... Not bad for the first go around... More to come this season!

Coffee Love Affair

Boom! 5am, my phone is going nuts trying to revive me from last nights coma. As I struggle to move into reality, I slowly reach over and turn the alarm off, get out of bed and take the stroll to the coffee maker. As I wait for that fresh brew, I can catch some quick Z’s.

This becomes a quick ritual and some wonder, what is the deal with cyclists and coffee? Seems like we are always in our kits at some Java House (Hopefully Supporting the “Local Guy”) pre and post ride. So what is the buzz about?

Personally, there are a lot of great contents of coffee, mainly caffeine. This stimulant has been on and off the hot topic radar for huge period of time, but has tons of great properties for active individuals! Even I had to take some time to really gather all its properties, I am not even going to try to list them… but there are some great resources out there visit http://coffeescience.org/ and http://www.cosic.org/ who can give you the whole story, now all you need to know is what brew you are making tomorrow!

So many brands, so many flavors and too little time! I am whole bean type of guy and enjoy that freshness from the grind-your-own style, with that in mind I would love to go over some great brands and where you can get them.

Kinetic Koffee
• USDA Organic Coffee available at some select bike shops or online at www.kinetic-koffee.com
• Best value and prepackaged beans you can buy
• Great flavors will give you that extra kick in the morning!

Fresh Market
• Organic and non-organic blends
• Fresh varieties from $7.99-$13.99/lb
• The best roasts and flavors keeping you going all day

Whole Foods
• Allegro and 365(store brand) Organic blends
• Fresh varieties from $11.99-$15.99/ lb
• Not quite as fresh and tasty as Fresh

Ocala Stage... The End of 2008

So its October and we are still racing our bikes in Florida� As we finish the season off I was heading into the final weekend high up in the Florida Points Standings and looking to jump into the 6th spot. We finished in style with a three event stage race which consisted of two road races and a short time trial.

The road race on Saturday started a little mellow, I did my signature early attack hoping to try and bring some people with me. This was a failure. I decided to sit in at that point and see what happens as we had a time bonus sprint in about 5 miles. As we're rolling into the bonus sprint we went up a hill and then downhill towards the line, the last mile to the line were strung out and nervous! Chris (teammate) and I were in great position about 5th and 6th wheel coming into the hill. Suddenly, Chris and another rider began bumping shoulders and next thing I know Chris was on the ground, along with half the field. One of my other teammates somehow got ran over by the motorbike, did a full flip and landed on his feet running! I ended up taking 2nd in bonus to Grant Potter(Herbalife), who is flying coming off Master's Worlds!

Despite some late moves the race was doomed to end in a field sprint. I figured with my time bonus I was sitting pretty, I came up the hill 3rd wheel and was rocketing on the sprint when the wheel in front of me sat up and I became boxed in. Took 7th in the stage, 3rd in GC. Chris decided to pack it up after that since he was pretty banged up.

Next up the TT, which was 5.2 miles� It was hilly so extremely hard to get a rhythm. I ended up losing a minute by the end. I still put in a good time at 10:10� But it surely wasn't the 9:02 Bobby Sweeting(Toshiba-Santo) had posted! So going into the last stage I was 14th in the GC

The last stage was under 50 miles and it was pretty steady all day, a few attacks early showed that not a lot of people were interested in getting off the front. A few times I ended up off the front just when trying to string it out. As the race developed into the later laps, splits started to happen. I found myself into a 6 man group with all but two of the top 10 GC contenders. Another split occurred and I looked at the Herbalife rider since I knew he was protecting the overall lead for Grant Potter and he seemed content letting those guys up the road.

Soon after we got reeled back by the field it was pretty much an all out chase for the next 2 laps by Herbalife and Toshiba-Santo. I was pretty content watching these guys do all the work and stayed towards the top 20 guys to insure there would be no splits. As we entered the road back off the circuit, Grant Potter and Bobby Sweeting were throwing down and the break group was insight. I saw my chance develop when a few other riders including a Toshiba rider and myself attacked. We bridged up to the guys with about 1 mi to go and were driving it. I came into the corner third wheel and was waiting for a massive acceleration to happen, but never did. So I went from about 350 meters out and was able to hold everyone off! Taking 7th in the GC was also great!

Its always best to end the season with a win! Thanks to Robby Ketchell and CPT for keeping me fast all season. I have acheived all of my season goals and more with the best guidance I have had during my career.

Hello 2009! Hello GA! Hello Twlight Zone

Welcome back folks to the 2009 season! The season has started! These means long days and slow or slower rides! This venture started two weeks ago, as we rolled into the fall calendar for the Florida Points Series, with a nice 6 Hour day... This was great as I was able to get into the break on the Saturday Circuit. I kicked an attack with 4 laps to go and slowly got some people to follow to insure we stayed away.

The sprint was very close and I came out at 4th.

Sunday, we had a nice short Road Race and I felt like taking the bull by the horns, as we were in a combined 1,2,3 field and I wanted to thin the heard from the gun. Maybe not the best tactic, but I was able to rock 14th in the end after a long day of bridging gaps and sitting in breaks.

Moving into the next week, I had some back to back 4 hour days after taking Monday off. Then Thursday I went up to Georgia with some Florida mates; Josh Servi and Tom Bargnesi, for the upcoming six gap century. Not knowing what to expect, I rode a crappy gearing and worked hard all weekend. 11-23 was not great for those hills.

After the voyage, we rushed to get a ride in as soon as we arrived in Dehlonga, GA. We hustled and got kitted up and got in a nice 40 miler. As we got back, ate and drank a lot of beers, we got a phone call.... ENTER THE TWILIGHT ZONE

Our friends are on their way, but cannot find gas, and what is going on... there is no gas anywhere.

So we decided to start our trek for petrol... and to my surprise Georgia HAS NO GAS

Suddenly we morph into 1974! I need more beer for this one!

So eventually our mates found a station that had gas and made it to our cabin.... we head to bed and set voyage for our next epic day of riding.

WE wake up and gas seems to be the hot topic all day, eventually it became a joke about finding gas, but I was never far enough back in the group to hear the BS.

SO day one: we hit Niels gap, Jack's gap then right up to Brasstown Bald, then back up the other side of Niels to a nice lunch and some Newcastle.

Just to let you know we were not holding back... Josh and I were firing shots off like we were racing for a tour stage. Josh was definitely the man up Niels and somehow I was able to gas him up the Bald!

Back into town, we head for a night of Terrapin Pale Ale and food...

The next day (Still no gas) OH WAIT 45 mins in line at a station and we find gas!

Supposedly we are having a nice easy ride, but a group of cyclists can never ride easy. We hit up the back side of Woody's gap and start another epic throw down...

Saturday night we ate in and did not party as the century was upon us.

CENTURY DAY!!!!

So there is more people than I have ever seen and I felt awful for the first 40 miles. I came unglued on Jack's gap and rode in small groups the rest of the day. Somehow I felt great the last 20 miles and rode flat out. I came in at 5:40.... Pretty respectable. Josh came in around 5:55 and Tom had a Mechanical. Honestly this was the hardest century I have ever done. 6 epic climbs spread into 104 miles, made this not for the kids. I was in pieces after rolling in.

So this meant tons of food and BEER

We party and Head back Monday.....

20 hours later and 500 miles later... Hello 2009